It has been far too long since my fingers have found themselves comfortably nestled on my old Macbook from college. So many mornings and nights were filled with 100 words per minute discussing everything from my latest headache to my latest breakfast. Marriage happened and suddenly I forgot what it meant to share my feelings as opposed to just feeling them.
I let days, weeks, and (dare I say) a year go by before I finally agreed to blog for the Women's Ministry at my home church. So much had happened in my heart and my head since the day I logged off of my personal blog that I forgot how freeing it felt to see characters flood the screening. I tried blogging for my business, but something just didn't seem like a fit. I love what I do, but the words I write don't necessarily fit the brand of my business but the brand of my everyday.
In the past six months I've had a whole lotta mountains and valleys (or Peaches N' Pits, if that's more your flavor). I tackled insecurities about who I was called to be both in my passion for service and for creativity, I saw the bitterness of depression but the sweetness of healing, we uprooted from one street and bought our first home on a corner. We got our first dog or should I say baby? It's hard to tell the difference. And I realized what a drought I was in when it came to me and the Lord. I had long left Him in the dust and let things and life and feelings become top priority over me laying my everything at His feet.
In January, I remember all of my friends saying that their 'word for the year was.....'. Y'all I didn't have a word. I prayed for a word. I searched books for a word. I even found myself in the endless scroll of Instagram just looking for some kind of sign. I needed a word, but I got a whole lot of nothing. Early one morning while braving the workroom at Warren, I said hello to our 'printer guy', Benjamin. Benjamin has a heavy African accent and having a conversation with him sometimes just ends up with me smiling and shaking my head because I'm too busy or too confused to listen. Before I could say how are you, he looked at me and said, "Your word for the year is victory, right?"...I stopped. Hold up, no I stopped talking, couldn't feel my feet, and shook my head up and down acknowledging the very words the Lord spoke over me in that moment.
Victory.
Little did I know, this year would be the year that would constantly feel like a battle, and God wanted me to know that victory wasn't something I needed to fight for because as His child I already get to fight from a place victory. And the vine?
I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.
John 15:5
Need I say more? The year isn't over yet, but one thing is clear. I can't do anything apart from Him.
This blog isn't another place for pretty pictures (although there will be some floating around), it's a place for celebration, for memories, for dreams, for encouragement. There might be days when all I want to tell you about is how good my cinnamon cereal was but there will also be days when I want to challenge me and YOU to think bigger, trust more, and always, always be brave.
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